I kinda went through the same thing with bowling. I had been a
competitive league bowler from my childhood years until I turned
42, at which point I went into my own business and didn't have
time to bowl any more. I put bowling out of my mind entirely,
and I really didn't think I missed it. After I sold my business
four years later, and went back to the 9-5 world, I got back into
bowling, and found that I still loved it tremendously, and wondered
how I had managed to go four years without the challenge and the
Sometimes, when something (or someone) we love is taken from us, we push away our real feelings to protect ourselves. The feelings are still there, but they're locked up in a box deep inside us. Sooner or later, they come out again. In my opinion, that's what happened to you. It was obvious to anyone who watched you play that you were passionate about the game. The game you loved was taken from you through no fault of your own, and it hurt, badly.....and you protected yourself by pushing the game away.
Good to see your name on the board again, big guy. I hope you are well.